Rules of Attraction
In 1938, Parade magazine published this illustrated dating advice piece in hopes of helping single women everywhere ace their next date. And while some of the tips are dead on, click through for the most sexist, infuriating and hilarious dating suggestions on the Internet.
Don't Be Conspicuous
"Don't be conspicuous talking to other men. The last straw is to pass out from too much liquor. Chances are your date will never call again!"
Don't Drink Too Much
"Don't drink too much, as a man expects you to keep your dignity all evening. Drinking may make some girls seem clever, but most get silly."
Don't Talk About Clothes
"Don't talk about clothes or try to describe your new gown to a man. Please and flatter your date by talking about things he wants to talk about."
Don't Be Familiar
"Don't be familiar with your escort by caressing him in public. Any open show of affection is in bad taste, usually embarrasses or humiliates him."
Again, Don't Be Familiar
"Don't be familiar with the head waiter, talking about the fun you had with someone else another time. Men deserve, desire your entire attention."
Wear a Brassiere
"If you need a brassiere, wear one. Don't tug at your girdle, and be careful your stockings are not wrinkled."
Don't Be a Careless Woman
"Careless women never appeal to gentlemen. Don't talk while dancing, for when a man dances, he wants to dance."
Don't Use His Handkerchief
"Men don't like girls who borrow their handkerchief and smudge them with lipstick. Makeup in privacy, not where he sees you."
Do Your Dressing in Your Boudoir
"Do your dressing in your boudoir to keep your allure. Be ready to go when date arrives; don't keep him waiting. Greet him with a smile!"
Don't Sit in Awkward Positions
"Don't sit in awkward positions — and never look bored, even if you are. Be alert, and if you must chew gum (not advised), do it silently, mouth closed."
Don't Use the Car Mirror
"Don't use the car mirror to fix your make-up. Man needs it in driving, and it annoys him very much to turn around to see what's behind him."
Don't Be Sentimental
"Don't be sentimental or try to get him to say something he doesn't want to by working on his emotions. Men don't like tears, especially in public places."
They're fat! They're plain! They have bad hair!
These dating tips from the 1930s are part infuriating, part hilarious and completely sexist
Beauty procedures from the '20s, '30s and '40s look a lot more like a torture chamber than a salon
Norma Desmond, Blanche DuBois and Mrs. Robinson were actually a lot younger than they seemed back in the day
Six decades of dieting proves that losing weight the old-fashioned way didn't work either
Those instants when we suddenly think that maybe we ain't that young anymore